What Does Rescue Look Like?

A strong, worthwhile post about how the Church approaches mental health is over at www.aholyexperience.com. My sense is that as more and more of us, believers and not, struggle with depression, the Church in general is holding us up with grace and compassion. She is a blessing.

On the other hand, my kids and I have become uncomfortably sensitive to the plethora of suicide jokes and references in American culture...but not offended. People make jokes about everything, without thinking it through, and I understand that. I just try to stay on the surface and not let my mind go to my own experience.

I finished the article in tears, though, because I've been wrestling with the conundrum of God's mercy and man's stubborn free will. Yes, He is our Healer - but only if we let Him heal. And what does that healing look like?

"I will extol Thee, O Lord, for Thou hast lifted me up, and hast not let my enemies rejoice over me, O Lord my God. I cried to Thee for help, and Thou didst heal me...." (Psalm 30) We cried for help, Mark cried for help. Many cried for help on his behalf, but he wasn't healed, although clearly one of "the afflicted," one of the oppressed mentioned so many times in the Psalms as those whom God will rescue. His enemies rejoiced over him on November 6th.

 I've never heard any preachers consider Hebrews 5:7, which tells us that Jesus was heard because of his loud cries and tears...and the fact that He still died. What does it mean that He was heard? Would God have not raised Him if He hadn't been heard? Of course He would have been raised - that was foretold, and He Himself explained to his perplexed disciples that it was going to happen.

So what exactly did God the Father hear from Him in that garden? And how did He answer? It's not what we assume it was.

Rescue did not look as His disciples expected it to.

And when a brain is in the throes of serotonin-depletion and bipolar stress, a body feels as though it is dying, and a spirit is under cataclysmic attack, where is the choice in that? How free is our will in that case?

The author's mama came home. But my husband did not. At this point, although my trust in God's goodness and faithfulness is stronger than ever, I have no clue toward the answers to those questions. Right now, June 2013, I don't really expect to have any.