Tense
I realized the other day that I can no longer say, "I have been in ministry almost 25 years." I have to say, "I was in ministry almost 25 years."
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simple past tense
I was listening to one of Mark's sermons, and the world I used to live in came back so strongly. I was engaged, with my mind and spirit and body, in life and ministry. Mark and I talked about everything, evaluated, planned, prayed through things, wondered, organized, spent most of our days with people God was working in, worked with all that we were.
Today I go to a place of ministry, but I am not involved in it. I sit in a chair behind open windows of a booth and push a button - literally, that's the main thing I do! I push a button to let people in a door. I hand out clipboards with forms to be filled out. I have a very small ministry of being warm and helpful and friendly to worried people, trying to lighten their days just a little. But I have to be careful not to connect too much with most of them, because they are men in fragile situations, and I am a woman who could be very sympathetic. So mostly I hold back.
On one hand, God has given me everything I need: a job that pays just what I need it to and lets me be home when the boys are, with minimal demands. On the other hand, I see needs I so want to meet but am restricted from.
I assume there is a reason for it, that God has me in this place to show me something. Right at this moment I am pretty fuzzy on what that might be! I've tried to figure it out...but He seems to be saying, don't even try to figure it out yet. Just take each day I give you, do what you have to do in it, and see where I take you.
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I just hope I have the patience and receptivity to learn it, eventually.
simple past tense
I was listening to one of Mark's sermons, and the world I used to live in came back so strongly. I was engaged, with my mind and spirit and body, in life and ministry. Mark and I talked about everything, evaluated, planned, prayed through things, wondered, organized, spent most of our days with people God was working in, worked with all that we were.
On one hand, God has given me everything I need: a job that pays just what I need it to and lets me be home when the boys are, with minimal demands. On the other hand, I see needs I so want to meet but am restricted from.
I assume there is a reason for it, that God has me in this place to show me something. Right at this moment I am pretty fuzzy on what that might be! I've tried to figure it out...but He seems to be saying, don't even try to figure it out yet. Just take each day I give you, do what you have to do in it, and see where I take you.
I just hope I have the patience and receptivity to learn it, eventually.
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